Gossip: What people say about you

We decided, at the request of a reader, to write about gossip and along the way, look at what others have gossiped about it. We decided, at the request of a reader, to write about gossip and along the way, look at what others have gossiped about it.

What could be said under the influence of a potion confessional to the question: "Why always talk about other people?"

We imagined the answer, "Apparently, because I have much to say about me."

Before calling the basket of the prices we chose, we can also pass along a couple of our own consolations. One is much better to be interesting enough to be talked about than to be the party that is making headlines. Two empty gossip maneuvers take place in a playground, in fact, on a swing. The child who delights in stuttering you see above - the higher the better - and think that putting him or her down or she has put on. Tada!

Now we turn to what others have gossiped about it. It seems, not surprisingly, that has animated brilliance rarely subject.

"The trouble with her is that she has the power of conversation, but not the word of power." George Bernard Shaw

"I know it's a secret, for its whispered everywhere." William Congreve

"They come together as the investigation of the coroner, to sit on the reputation murdered the week." Congreve

"I hate to spread rumors, but what else can I do with them?" Amanda Lear

"If you have nothing good to say about anybody come sit with me." Alice Roosevelt Longworth

"He proceeds to dip her little fountain-pen filler into pots of oily venom and squirt the mixture into all his friends." Harold Nicolson

"I'm out by companies in particular - but I leave behind me my character." Richard Brinsley Sheridan

"Here is the whole thing! A character dead at every word." Same Sheridan

"There's only one thing in the world worse than being talked about and not talk." Oscar Wilde

"A professional athlete - the language." Aldous Huxley

Social purification. George Meredith

"Foul whisperings." William Shakespeare (sometimes gossip referrred Billy Wigglestick)

Press another audio message from Bin Laden Hideout too dark for Video

Apparently unable to contain his enthusiasm for bumming people unaware that they are relatively pleasant and most of the Western world, the medievalist misinformed issued another audio message threatening sadly. As the combined political, military and intelligence resources of the civilized world can not locate the Potato Head, we recommend the audio message to be taken as an opportunity to arrest him.

Here's how. Someone buys a camera recluse resources and battery lights. As long happy to show her narcissistic self and give voice to his unfortunate disjunction in thought informed, we assume that he is not currently in possession of a camera or he is crouching down in a secret compartment that is too dark shoot anything but firearms.

Can not be afraid that a video will reveal its position, because he can always hang the same kind of chintzy curtain behind him that his second original medieval misguidance, Aman Al-Zawahiri, uses it exits the cave enough long for his eyes to adjust to the light to an inflammatory video, with, we have noted, the output values that are at the same level as a commercial for a chain of discount that has difficulty getting a foot in the city of Mexican border.

The only condition is, upon receipt of the material, OBL must agree to make a video about signs to his hideout. To extend his celebrity short, we can also deliver in installments. The media will be wild for this.

We do not know why not accept this opportunity to display his ego worldwide long-narrow, because in the final report had only four wives, and, if he believes His Own sermons deadly silent, after he goes to heaven of his overheated and sadly misleading imagination, can have 27 virgins.

Of course, we must interpose a man with four wives, which contained with 27 virgins as a good time for reflection has done very little about what it really is to have four companions and very little experience with virgins.

He should not be overly concerned about these complications can not, however, because, as linguistic analysis has revealed some time ago, the Arabic word for virgin can also mean grapes, depending on whether or not there is a tomb. Shows that in the particular context in which it has applied to ensure the suicide of his companion, but ready emanations a bit 'more fool from the Dark Ages, the meaning is about 27 grapes. So crazy, crazy Muslims slammed in our World Trade Center - which was, in fact, a common treasure of mankind, built to facilitate worldwide economic competence and development - and incinerated nearly three thousand of our beloved, hard-working and relatively normal people made to collect premiums imagination could have found in a fruit market.

Meanwhile, Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, his lackey who is not an Iraqi, had his head in default of a better one. Spiffily dressed in black like a fresh enemy of humanity, shook with the same burr misinformed him and his mentor have both wanted to become, even by their own people.

Ah, what we have to pay a toll for the deadly duo of ignorance and backwardness! Witness the bombing unreasonable in Egyptian resort of Dahab, apparently in time to follow the latest pontification OBL's audio only.

How do people who do not make sense for other people expect anyone to do anything but scrape and run? Someone should tell them that solidarity is really the main sentiment that makes the human race worthy of its own continuation of this blessed land, but ruined.

As for OBL, when it will be some real-life Indiana Jones to find out where he is hiding, so we can finally give the evil plague his sleep late?

Baby Boomers moderate exercise, lack of notice in marathons Seniors

Baby boomers who exercise more than any generation before them, have been flocking to orthopedic surgeons to tend to their aching joints and tendons.

As the news spread of the growing need surgery, a number of boomers have found the willpower to moderate the intensity of their workout routine.

Personal experience has confirmed the wisdom of moderation. For example, an inveterate runner was shocked by the surprising perception that there were a lot of elderly people dashing across the finish line in New York City Marathon.

He began to wonder if at a certain age less strenuous activity may actually be, not only for the better part of health care, but that's all a generally available. He also began to wonder if the elderly who persisted with intense physical challenges, like the marathon were absent or near the finish line, because literally abandoned by the roadside. He dismissed this possibility, because it really challenged his hope for young people up-to-the-last-minute.

He shared the opportunity to moderation with a boom colleagues who happened to be his girlfriend. Agreed to consider, but evidence against the surprising comeuppance. So, while working at his gym, looked around and noticed, to his amazement, that there were many older people with her sweat, especially on the running track and weight room.

Most disturbing of all, he noticed that many of the runners seemed confused her junior.

He had the courage to break the stunning revelation to a friend, who said her boyfriend. Since the hot news has a way of life through the boomers, after the lost generation was abuzz with the call for moderation.

Be serious about their health, many have studied the consequences of persistent excess bone-crushing exercise and found that that should really get some 'easy on yourself, especially since many of them are flirting with 60 years . It seems that if they can convince themselves of the wisdom, at least some restraint will go a long way toward preserving their knees, ankles, and assorted joints, tendons and muscles. They could also save on visits to a surgeon.

As expected, however, the boom of the hardliners are taking a year-over-attitude until-you-drop.

Like a recalcitrant member of the group said, "Hey, it's like the exercise came with the genes. I can not change my routine more than I change my feet, than waking up every morning ready to run for miles."

This group is so determined that wish to exercise excessively, even if it means halting older limping because of self-inflicted. As another member of the over-exercise group or you're over-the-Hill said: "Look, if I'm going to need a knee replacement or two, I could well be one of the first of my generation to get one."

France attacks Iran: U.S. and Britain Object

France, putting aside his usual insistence on diplomacy, even when it is obvious to anyone who happens to be aware that not work, finally lost patience with the behavior with crackling Iranian centrifuges and has launched a unilateral attack on it .

As French mirage jets swooped down on Iranian nuclear facilities and the French troops began a ground assault from warships in the Persian Gulf, the United States and Britain expressed immediate objections.

President Bush said: "I do not understand why the French have gone ahead and attacked Iran without consulting us. It 's just the right not to do things without having to board your allies."

Tony Blair said, "I think President Chirac would give more time for diplomacy to work. After all, we know that will be 'at least a month or more before Iran has a nuclear bomb."

On the other hand, German Chancellor Angela Merkel expressed support for the French attack, saying: "I felt it was time for European leaders to act as highhandedly as Americans did in Iraq."

"Meanwhile, President Jacques Chirac has rejected the concerns of allies and promised to continue its policy of doing alone, declaring:" I was at my ranch in Bordeaux, where I understand Iran is even closer to France than it in America. Of course, you usually wait for America to lead a war we know is necessary for our safety. AND 'cheaper and more popular with French voters. But I decided that this is a war the French had to pay the bill, even without American and British approval.

The UN has not yet issued a comment on the strike prior French. At the time of writing, the Secretary-General Kofi Annan had just finished his morning coffee, a drink that has long been his name, and he was about to wander over to the General Assembly to determine whether the diplomats wanted to discuss the possibility to discuss the attack.

Along the way, he said: "One might think that Jacques would have at least given me some notice us. Although a lot of people have come to doubt the UN is still here."

Hispanic immigrants show, "illegal" Not In Spanish Dictionary

demonstrated by the thousands of Hispanic immigrants who claim that their right to become citizens of the land of the gringos.

While we welcome the efforts of all those who wish to become a citizen of our nation free and exhausted, we noted that there appeared to be no distinction between immigrants who live here in peaceful law and who is anxious to lawlessness.

We consider the matter and discovered that the word "illegal" is not in the Spanish dictionary. We entered the English version of the controversial term in an online dictionary Spanish-English, which returned the following result: "Spanish results: Sorry, no Spanish found."

This seemed too easy an explanation of the matter at national level for the subject as "Mum's the word," so we decided that we had pursued the issue properly and went forward. We then learned that there really is a Spanish word for "illegal", but, expectedly enough, is specified in a slightly different way than it is in English, as "ilegal".

We were also able to determine that the whole concept into the language of the protesters is illusion "Inmigrante ilegal"

Why, we wondered, had the distinction received at least one tip of the sombrero?

Of course, we soon realized that many illegal immigrants have been in America for so long have forgotten the Spanish word for themselves.

Once we understand the nature of the emerging situation, we immediately felt overwhelming sympathy for them. Just imagine feeling at home in a country where, instead of being accepted as full citizens, are still considered just another Inmigrante ilegal.

There is a smart way to resolve the border dispute? And by the way, it takes smart to include mutual respect. We also take it means considering the welfare of the company bottom-line-folded and are used to paying low wages these aspiring unquestionably noble effort on the way?

This is our resolution charitably understood. We agree to legalize those who are here only by hook or crook underground and probably would never make it back. T his pace will delight.

In return, those who managed to scrape together enough money to buy false papers decide to return to their homeland Hispanic, which will make those who oppose their presence at least less vehement.

Finally, as we all know that ilegals Inmigrante who agree to leave will return as soon as may vary the purchase of another set of documents viable, the U.S. companies that depend on paying a wage that is an outrage, such as Tyson Foods and any Farms , will rest content. Surely, they and the U.S. economy as a whole can get along for the relatively short period a handful of deportees are legally outside the country.

The only other approach we think is smart to interview Inmigrantes one by one and start a process of citizenship for all those who seem to be standing, hardworking people and deport all those who seem to be very hard work of criminals.

Iraqi insurgents in secret talks; May Admit fighting wrong enemy

Iraqi insurgent groups, in secret talks with President Jalal Talabani cleverly pacify, admitted that he may have fought the wrong enemy. Upon hearing the admission, the President Taliban struck his forehead so hard he fell backwards and was unconscious for about three days.

After being resuscitated, he said the talks. Apparently, the rebels, most of whom are Sunni Muslims, have slowly begun to realize that American and coalition troops, who they were doing their best to kill, might not be the real enemy. It seems that are also growing disenchanted with the practice of blowing up a dozen of their fellow citizens every day.

Although it is too early to expect to realize that coalition troops are actually useful heroes who liberated the country from tyranny and murder will be happy to start their reign of sand as they can get their act together and manage their country, the groups said they were willing to consider various marginal surrender their arms and explosives along the road.

Behind the change in their sentiment seems to be not only their grief for a long time, late in dismembering their country, but the knowledge that they are dangerously bordering their traditional enemy, Iran, as they have been for a long bit 'a thousand years, and that because of discord continues, Iran has managed to increase its influence in the country, especially among their peers uncomfortable Shiite mosque the quota of the legions of Muhammad. This perception is particularly upsetting for the insurgents because, as noted above, most of them rival Sunni Mosque-ovites.

Their realization maddening slowness of their mistakes are likely provoke little more than ironic displeasure of many families, both Iraqi and coalition, who have lost loved ones during their fury wrong.

But at least their willingness to talk and to consider mending their ways of detonating a glimmer of hope for families whose sons and daughters are still in Iraq, trying to do the right thing by the Iraqi people, Sunni and Shiite alike.

May the day soon come When enough of Knucklehead realize the error of their war and we know that other nations are in the hot sand that we had in ourselves can finally get our troops much underestimated the heck out of there.

Quit with the checkbook Open

Joey, daring the spotlights that were scanning the store where he WAS locked up, took a quick glance out the window the crowd below, and cried: "Never, dirty, rotten bill collectors!" Then he leaned back to the shelter under the sill.

Recently got into debt than usual - in fact, found himself surrounded by it - and he was a restless dream about the multitude of collectors who were haunting his mind. Being a fan of old movies with smiling memories of Jimmy Cagney, his brain had somehow cast him in a role familiar to all those who feel a similar attachment to the legacy of Cagney. Her black dress was dusty, with the white shirt was open and had a bottle of whiskey beside him, from whom he took an occasional reinforcement.

"Joey, can you hear me?" The Verizon customer service representative called through a megaphone. "This is Verizon."

"Whaddaya want?" Joey recalled.

"This is a final disconnection notice.

"Already?" Joey said, and looked at the scattered pile of bills on the floor. He started nervously and found to browse the Verizon bill. "I have the bill here," yelled out the window. "It's only fifteen days late. I have a month or two before disconnecting my service?"

"No more, boy," cried the spokesman for Verizon. "You have a bad payment record."

"Yes, so what do you want me to do?" Joey replied, knowing that he had no funds to pay the bill at the time. He earned his living as a freelance journalist, and he had only recently through a period when he had made his usual number of articles. Fortunately, he finally sold a piece of Travel & Leisure.

Just then one of the policemen in the crowd raised his megaphone and shouted: "Joey, this is responsible O'Hara. Come out with your checkbook open - or else!"

"Otherwise what is dirty, copper stinkin '?" Joey shouted back.

"I'll tell ya what, kid," the Verizon representative interposed. "We stop the service output. And get this, Joey. Three days later, we stop incoming calls - and that includes the DSL Internet service. "

"No, no, everything but my ADSL! Joey called. "I am a freelance magazine writer. If I can not email my articles, I'll be finished. Having a little 'pity, will ya? I've been a customer of Verizon for over ten years!"

"Sorry, Joey," a spokesman for Verizon said, "We have to go with the rules."

At that time, the representative of Con Ed reached for the megaphone, informing the representative of Verizon, "It 's my turn. You had your shot." Then he shouted, "Joey, you know who this is? Con Ed."

"What are you doing 'here?" Joey requested.

"You know as well as me. Your electric bill is due."

"Arrears?" Joey replied. "I give him back!" And with that, he mooned the crowd.

"Look, kid," Officer O'Hara called by his megaphone. "This is indecent exposure. You could end up in the pen."

"You think I care?" Joey shouted back. "At least I will not pay for my accommodation and meals.

Reacting to this comment, a lawyer who had been unusually quiet until now, reached for the megaphone. "Speaking of food and lodging, Joey, is a lawyer with a message from your landlord.

"No, no, not that one, too!" Joey dying, and style Cagneyesque, made two fists and rubbed her temples with them.

"You're more than a month behind!" The lawyer reminded him, and took a left, legal-size document. "I notice of eviction right here."

"A notice of eviction?" Joey complained.

"Yes," replied the lawyer. "You must leave the room!"

Then the Con Ed representative took the megaphone back, saying: "I was not finished with him." He turned to the warehouse in which Joey was holed up. "This is your final notice, boy. If full payment is not received today, the service will be discontinued. This means that the lights out!"

"Yes, yes, I feel ya," Joey called, and he lied. "I put a check by mail.

"When you're outgoing mail?"

"Tuesday".

"This is what you said last week, Joey" the representative shot back, raising his record of accounts. "I have proof right here."

"But it's February! Without electricity, I could freeze to death."

"We apologize for any inconvenience."

The lawyer reached for the megaphone again. "About electric bill, Joey - do not worry."

"Why not?"

It was now tied the legal document around a rock and held it up. "Why must leave the premises within three days of notification of this notice." Then he threw the stone-bound document toward the window. "Read It!"

It broke through the top of the window and fell on the floor. Joey shook the glass fragments out of himself, crawled to the document recently arrived, and slipped out of the rock. He looked at him and muttered to himself, "The pressure, as you can take all this pressure?" Then, with renewed resolve, she called back "I do not like us come to life! Never!"

The policeman raised his megaphone. "Joey, listen to me. This is Officer O'Hara again. Be reasonable. No phone, no DSL, no lights, no heat. What is life? Doing the right thing and leave the checkbook."

"I need time," Joey recalled. "There is a check by mail.

The crowd burst into laughter and variously commented, "Not that sad story again!

"No, no, I mean, a check is post to me."

They laughed even harder.

"I do not understand," he said. "Tellin For once, I'm 'the truth. You have my word on this."

"Your word?" The lawyer asked, and laughed even more heartily. "You know what that is worth it? Not a penny plug!"

"We heard that one before, Joey - heard too many times," the representative said Con Ed.

"What is the source of control?" Verizon asked.

"I sold an article for the magazine Travel & Leisure. An important piece. I have to almost three majors.

"You said almost three big?" Verizon wanted to know.

"You heard me," Joey confirmed.

"When you control the alleged debt?" The lawyer asked.

"Every day. Accountant told me that in the mail."

"In the mail?" Said the lawyer, with a nice look cynically at repetition. "No Dice, boy. What kind of chumps do you think we are?"

"But it's Travel & Leisure, not a report of two bits. It always pays on time." He reconsidered his options. "If this is not good enough, how about this? I'll take care of you all of my control multiple accounts.

At the mere mention of that resource, the Citibank representative took the megaphone. "Not so fast, Joey. This is Citibank. Have you used your control anymore."

"All?" Joey requested.

Worse, boy. You crossed the line of credit. Today, we had to bounce three checks. "

"Not that! Other than this!"

"Sorry, kid, we had no choice. Admit it. You are at the end of your rope."

"Just so I know who were the controls?"

The representative looked at Citibank account of Joey. "The Chinese Laundry, the result of the Korean market and Blockbuster."

"Blockbuster? How could you do this to me?" I'll never be able to rent a DVD again. "

"Tough luck, kid. She did not give us any choice."

"But I'm a good customer. I've been with Citibank since my arrival in the Big Apple."

"Yes, and you've collected a long history with us. I'm sorry the whole story right here."

"Come on, have a little 'pity, will ya? Increase my credit line. I'll pay you back. You know I'm good for that."

"It can not be done, boy, your credit score is too low."

Now, a matronly woman worked her way up to the front of the crowd. "Please, let me talk to him," he complained

"Who are you, ma'am?" Officer O'Hara asked.

"I'm his mother."

"His mother? That's all he had to say."

He turned toward repetition. "We're givin 'her a shot."

The Citibank representative handed her a megaphone, saying, "Good luck, lady."

He turned to the store and looked at the window. Struggling to see through the light of the spotlights that traced across the facade, he said, "Joey?"

He looked up. "Are you, Mom?"

"Yes, Joey."

"Look, Mom, I'm sorry about this, but I'm in trouble, big trouble. I'm in over my head."

"I know, son."

"There's only one way out for me. I know I'm a grown man and I hate to ask, but I can find a great? I'll return, I promise."

"I would if I could, son. But I did not receive social security check until next week. How about a hundred? Can I eat bologna sandwiches until then."

"Hundred?" Joey asked. "You said a hundred, Mom?"

"Yes, Joey. I'm sorry. It 's the best I can do."

"Okay, Mom. I keep. I'm in too deep. You can not help me anymore."

"You know I love you."

"Yes, I know, Mom. I'm sorry I did not do better in life."

Just then a truck drove up the mail, with the horn sound like a trumpet. The crowd turned toward it. The postman jumped out, placed in his hand and said: "Fear not, the mail is here!"

"Do not tell me?" Joey called. "Did you get my check?"

The postman took a white envelope out of the handful of other spy letters and held it up proudly. "I got right here, Joey."

"Did you hear that, you dirty rats?" Joey drew, and stood up, dusting it off. "I received the check."

"Can I look?" The lawyer asked with the usual skepticism.

The postman has the envelope as a billboard.

The lawyer studied, and said: "It is by Travel & Leisure all right, and his gaze, I would say that is definitely a check."

A murmur rippled through the crowd.

"Did you hear that?" Said a spokesman for Verizon. "He took control."

"What do you know? The boy has gained control," the Citibank representative admitted.

Joey left the palace, a free man, and walked toward the crowd. Reached out and took control from the postman. "Thanks, man."

"Just doin 'my job," replied the postman.

Then he walked to his truck with an electronic irrepressible swagger heroic.

"Oh, Joey, I'm so happy for you," his mother poured.

"Thanks, Mom," he said, and put his arm around her.

The lawyer, becoming instantly friendly, reached his arm around Joey. "Problem solved as a good boy. Just pay and you can stay."

"And you can rely on Con Ed to supply all the electricity is needed," the spokesman assured.

The Verizon representative winked and added, "We're the phone company. You know, Joey. You have all the services you want, including your DSL."

"And more control over your account," the Citibank representative told him. "We're going to find a way around your credit score, so we can give you a raise."

"Really? Hey, whaddaya know? It just goes to show that what a normal guy like me can do when it gets a check."

He tore the envelope and looked at the welcome small piece of paper that had just saved from a fate worse than death. Then she kissed him and held it up for all to see.

"I am a free man! Movement of all my debts more urgent."

With that realization, he smiled and slipped into a sleep much more deeply satisfying.