Movie Stars as sources of wisdom

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Dick Cheney Card At Dale Carnegie, Curriculum Updates

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Theory of Evolution Challenged by French chef; Cites role of food and wine

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Jokes, best medicine in the world

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Pat Robertson confesses! God angry with him, tells him he lost his mind

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Happy Trails, America! But where are they?

Judging by the current national sentiments, Uncle Sam has once again emerged from the Happy Trails on which he prefers to drive. But it is possible, just the usual joshing shoulder, possibly help him wend his way back through the Tumbleweeds? Well, at least, we can give it a go.

To begin with, let us ask ourselves as free and prosperous nation wisely so painfully often wander away from the path on which you can find the conditions for happiness, including laudatio range of our allies and even encouragement to our personal happiness?

What happens if you search for clues, separating what has guided us, nationally and internationally, in two views: the steps we as a nation should take measures and we have chosen to take.

Since we do not have much choice about what drives the need, we are more inclined to repent from casting an expert eye on what we will. But just to see the various paths before us, to find my way home with unsurpassed safety, let's briefly explore the paths less promising for the remediation.

Where is the old bugaboo, the need, forcing us to go?

Nationally, more or less everything here is relatively tame - the generally accepted role of government as required under the defense policy, which, of course, includes whacking terrorists everywhere, keeping the right of citizens to wake up every morning and be free to decide What would do, if only they had to go to work, and making the timely filling of potholes.

Internationally, we must, of course, we can grow our allies, we encourage our greatest adversaries to conduct a reassuring, and do everything possible to facilitate the rewards of quasi-fair trade.

Since we have little or no choice on the above, we can only regard them as signs along the path that we must be as gopher holes or inevitable that we must be careful.

Now, we are the first signs of hope for a revelation of back-bound - the things that really have a choice about. And what do we see? None other than where we have strayed from our Happy Trails.

First, at the national level, you can actually choose to provide the usual litany of things that should have long ago as the schools we send our guys will come back safely with confidence and full of "news about the square of ' hypotenuse, "health care we can afford, without eviscerating our wallets, you can breathe the air without significantly undermining the longevity of our lungs, and you can drink the water that flows from our taps. We as individuals also choose to conduct ourselves so as to contribute to a healthy society each other, and the vociferous factions that would impose their advocacies on all of us could reacquaint himself with the delights of national diversity.

Now, finally reached the point where the path, we think, Uncle Sam has more dearly lost their way, that is, we set our eyes on things that America can choose to do at international level. Here, in fact, the point where we ran out of our paths regularly so happy you could conclude Uncle Sam, with some frequency, reached into his bag for a sip of 80-orientation test.

A suspect this position, we too often decided that the way to solve our problems at the international level is to go to war. We are not, of course, referring to the great wars, what necessity compels us to participate, such as World Wars I and II, and, just maybe, Korea. But the wars we have chosen to participate, the more miserable examples of misguidance to Vietnam and now Iraq. These guns away has never had to play and we never had to bear the loss of life and economically debilitating costs of their remorse.

But before he could stop wandering in these painful mishaps, we see an alternative path - one that definitely keeps our Happy Trails. And what could be revolutionary clean and healthy in our international behavior is?

We believe that, at this point in our short but insightful way home, the answer is before our eyes. Rather than war to achieve our goals, we have, working with our allies and all the friends that can attract, use our available naturally encouraging and persuasive economic power to bring the nations that would be truly free and democratic, while we left the ones who have a problem with these ideals obviously go above their own self-ways.Then defeat graciously we cultivate a world of emerging democracies of success, while our relatively uncertain antagonists would be confronted with examples that emphasize the error of their ways .

As a result, we would not be exhausted gladiator a reluctant empire, but happy emissaries of freedom and abundance. We live, not a world that can scapegoat for its troubles us the myriad of self-inflicted, but a world increasingly populated by copies of the ways we support, as recipients of our charity prosperous that they can, we expect, actually have some unusually complimentary things to say about us.

And speaking of fish, now that we would supply our national treasury gutted, you could also afford to provide our citizens with the right kind of support systems of the world's richest nation, would have long been able to provide abundance.

We wandered now, even if briefly, enough in our search for the way back to the trail junction just happy to know that there has often astray: Conduct for which we have a choice.

What we need is not the coercion of those who disagree with us, but the encouragement of those who want to emulate us. What we need is America, not so much as a power feared, but more nutritious as an example of what we consider the principles healthier.

We could, with these choices, in fact, achieve our goals at international level - and in ways that help us achieve our goals at the national level.

Yes, often rebellious uncle, with such information, we can once again we are happy trails - and you know, for the first time, how to keep themselves and our legendary white charger at right angles on them.

Karachi spotted Bin Laden, can transform itself into

Reports residence of Osama Bin Laden has taken a new turn this week when a Pakistani woman reported sighting a tall man in a white robe with matching turban hit his head on a low door.

Women's suspicions about the identity of a man were further aroused when he noticed the entrance led to a recording studio.

To avoid creating suspicion, he came without revealing who he thought might be.

"Are you okay?" She asked with the innocence hesitation.

"No," he said. "How am I to disagree? More than just cracking my head low in this portal, I'm Osama Bin Laden."

"Really?" She said, thinking of the $ 25 million reward for turning him in, as well as his opportunity to contribute to the triumph of justice.

"Yes," he continued. "I have not been good since I fled Tora Bora, it is also difficult for me to get out long enough to make my audio tapes."

"My, oh, my," she commiserated, "Everyone thinks you are in remote regions near the Afghan border."

"It seems that they know better," he confided. "How does a spoiled rich kid like me live this long without some of the features only a city can offer, such as a dialysis machine to keep me alive, and take-away food."

"This makes sense," he agreed.

"Yes, he does, but there is no danger that the authorities will understand where I am, because every time you record a tape, we filter out the noise of the city, such as horns and sirens."

"It 's very smart," he said. "You would think when they see the tapes are filtered out you can imagine you're in a place where there are sounds in the background."

"We hope not to catch on. I do not want them to take away from my next surprise move."

"Oh, a surprise move," he exclaimed. "Would you tell me about it?"

"No," he said, "because then there will be a surprise anymore. But just watch. I have no intention of going around forever in Karachi. I long for the most developed metropolitan delights in the capitals of the world. Now if you'll excuse me, my recording session is due to start. "

Then he waved goodbye and went out the door, this time remembering to duck.

The woman, excited about shortness of breath, went straight to the nearest police station and reported his surprising interaction.

Police immediately launched a search in Karachi for Bin Laden, vowing to pursue it as part of their trawl, apparently a bit 'porous terrorist.

However, they were shocked when the next day, Bin Laden called police headquarters and offered to turn himself in

When asked why he made the decision when the police, many of whom are devout Muslims, were doing everything possible to help him evade capture, he replied: "I can not stand it anymore. Hiding every day, afraid to go out of fear of entering into a conversation with a stranger that I could report, and having to spend all my time with my four wives, when I could sit in a topless club in America, like the martyrs that I sent to fly American planes into buildings were doing just before their great sacrifice. Worse still, one of my wives told me that could be misinterpreted, the Koran, because, he said, 'Islam' means peace. Praise be to God I did not , or I'll turn myself inside "

"Well, if you insist," the police said.

"I'll know for sure in a day or two," Osama replied, "I do not want to do it and then regret it later, especially now I have to be hanged."

.

p> Reports residence of Osama Bin Laden has taken a new turn this week when a Pakistani woman reported sighting a tall man in a white robe with matching turban hit his head on a low door.

Women's suspicions about the identity of a man were further aroused when he noticed the entrance led to a recording studio.

To avoid creating suspicion, he came without revealing who he thought might be.

"Are you okay?" She asked with the innocence hesitation.

"No," he said. "How am I to disagree? More than just cracking my head low in this portal, I'm Osama Bin Laden."

"Really?" She said, thinking of the $ 25 million reward for turning him in, as well as his opportunity to contribute to the triumph of justice.

"Yes," he continued. "I have not been good since I fled Tora Bora, it is also difficult for me to get out long enough to make my audio tapes."

"My, oh, my," she commiserated, "Everyone thinks you are in remote regions near the Afghan border."

"It seems that they know better," he confided. "How does a spoiled rich kid like me live this long without some of the features only a city can offer, such as a dialysis machine to keep me alive, and take-away food."

"This makes sense," he agreed.

"Yes, he does, but there is no danger that the authorities will understand where I am, because every time you record a tape, we filter out the noise of the city, such as horns and sirens."

"It 's very smart," he said. "You would think when they see the tapes are filtered out you can imagine you're in a place where there are sounds in the background."

"We hope not to catch on. I do not want them to take away from my next surprise move."

"Oh, a surprise move," he exclaimed. "Would you tell me about it?"

"No," he said, "because then there will be a surprise anymore. But just watch. I have no intention of going around forever in Karachi. I long for the most developed metropolitan delights in the capitals of the world. Now if you'll excuse me, my recording session is due to start. "

Then he waved goodbye and went out the door, this time remembering to duck.

The woman, excited about shortness of breath, went straight to the nearest police station and reported his surprising interaction.

Police immediately launched a search in Karachi for Bin Laden, vowing to pursue it as part of their trawl, apparently a bit 'porous terrorist.

However, they were shocked when the next day, Bin Laden called police headquarters and offered to turn himself in

When asked why he made the decision when the police, many of whom are devout Muslims, were doing everything possible to help him evade capture, he replied: "I can not stand it anymore. Hiding every day, afraid to go out of fear of entering into a conversation with a stranger that I could report, and having to spend all my time with my four wives, when I could sit in a topless club in America, like the martyrs that I sent to fly American planes into buildings were doing just before their great sacrifice. Worse still, one of my wives told me that could be misinterpreted, the Koran, because, he said, 'Islam' means peace. Praise be to God I did not , or I'll turn myself inside "

"Well, if you insist," the police said.

"I'll know for sure in a day or two," Osama replied, "I do not want to do it and then regret it later, especially now I have to be hanged."

Jimmy Hoffa continues to evade FBI

While the FBI, acting on a tip from a detainee who reported suspicious activity witnessed on the night of the disappearance of Jimmy Hoffa, the leader continues to seek former trooper, was somehow still able to evade capture.

Even if Mr. Hoffa disappeared more than fifty years ago, no sign of him or his remains were identified, despite a number of tips you can find.

Given the run-ins with the boss Carter had the FBI during the period in which he was certainly alive and observed that some say it's no wonder that refuses to be reported.

This week, the concrete floor of the granary of the oldest property in which the teamster boss of yore can be hidden has been excavated and, to a certain depth and color change was noted in the soil, there was, at the end of digging, still no sign of Jimmy.

The small town near the farm where the search is in progress began to do with the excavation treated lightly. A local bakery has created a new hit, calling him Jimmy Hoffa cupcakes. They consist of a land of chocolate cupcake with a coat of green jutting out of it and, according to the owners of the bakery, the new creation has become their hottest-selling item. Despite its apparent ability to escape, Mr. Hoffa has not yet dared to look at the bakery to buy one.

Meanwhile, at the farm, despite the efforts of the seekers of heavy equipment, forensic experts and search dogs, there was, at the end of the week, still no sign of Mr. Hoffa.

A forensic expert at the scene said: "It seems that we find it. It 'was born in February of 1913, so now he had to slow down a lot." He added: "But since he disappeared in 1975, one might think that the authorities have decided it's finally time to put the lid on the research."

However, as you know, the FBI always gets her man - a policy that should serve as a warning to Osama Bin Laden and his associates of evil. They may have eluded capture so far, but with the feds on their trail, they should know that no cave is too deep, no mountain too high.

The FBI never gives up, even after you're out of circulation in one way or another.

The Italian man asked the wrong question about Christ; Court Agrees To Hear Case

As you know, an Italian gentleman called on the Catholic Church, to prove that Christ existed, and while the case was a bit 'to be expected that, tossed in an Italian court, the plaintiff, undaunted, found a court The Strasbourg has agreed to hear it. It remains to be proved that the Catholic Church appointed to defend its historical foundation.

We should hold back from such a sensitive subject and leave you to your own doubts? No, dear reader, rest assured that we will never leave you afraid to follow what the competition more and more amazing everyday events can have on our front aspect fretted but smiling. After all, how much fresher and healthier, to realize we can share even the most subtle adumbrations that flutter through our fleeting moments of self-awareness.

So what is, in our opinion, the question is correct?

We prefer to ask if faith in Christ as the Son of God or any relevant change, helps people live better lives and deal with the uncertainties that shaking the huge question mark in the sky on why and dry completely, our mortal self, still results in many a fragile human being?

Or is faith in the divinity of Christ is being used to process the liability to the natural potential for the joy that life seems to be endowed, as it gives hope unshakable less than you could wish for certain eternal bliss?

What, pray, is the answer? Since the two can hardly be raised in a scale, the decision is, quite nicely, what, how the individual is undoubtedly are decisive, they have determined your estimated belief.

Dare we proceed to the evidence for or against what is known as the historical Jesus? What's more, ideational mate, would you expect?

First, as you know, the Romans kept nicely stories careful and prudent civic accounts. Yet there is little mention in what remains of the Roman records of an entity called Jesus Christ, with the exception of a brief notation in a house record, another in a Jewish history, or a line in a few letters. Some historians demanding in their histrionics, believing that Jesus performed wonders if he is reported to have made, its existence would be enlarged into a more elaborate documentation inviting.

Consequently considered evidence begins with the Christian man who has come to be known as St. Paul. While, unfortunately, too young to have known Jesus in person, apparently met with the existing characters Peter, James and John.

We also need to come to terms with the fact historically ominous headline that the four Gospels were written on paper at a later date than you would, in our hopes ideally prefer: sometime between AD 60 and AD 120. The book of Mark, considered the oldest of the four Gospels, made his initial appearance around the year 150 AD. While the historical record may have suffered a history of previous oral or written versions of the story of Jesus, of course, when it was written, the scribe never really broke bread with the central inspiration of his Gospel.

We did not, of course, invented one of the tests above. We have simply recorded as accurately as possible in a short space, that seems to have been handed down through the centuries.

Now, we go from our deliberations roam our starting point.

In the soul of our hopes and uncertainties, most of us are not too concerned about what has been historically invariable. We wonder what more likely in this vast and dangerous world is more useful or helpful to us and our humans uncertain. While it may not be as sharp penetrating question, it is certainly the kindest and then, in many ways, the most attractive rate.

By the way, the soul of light and wonder, there's another wrong question we must resolve before ending with. The gentleman in question by Italy also announced that he is an atheist, and we grant him his preference.

But a surprisingly incisive voices too praised the philosopher William James was able to say in his hopefulThe will to believe, is that we need as much information not to believe, as we would have you believe.

Once again we have to reach for the same practical and arpeggiated harp as follows:

The right question, or so it seems, is not whether God exists, but if we define God so that we can, with regard to science, be considered valid?

We can only share with you the definition that works for us, inviting small and, surprisingly, seems unquestionably convincing.

And here it is.

Since we, as demanding as we logically can not dare infer that the correct philosophical universe has a "cause" without which the followers of Hume Davy run to inform us that what we, as is often but not always fallible human beings, perceive as cause and effect can in fact be more accurately explicated as usual, but not flawless sequence.

So all we can say is it credible that all we see must have a source - an original or, if you will, an ultimate source - and that we, as inhabitants of the finiteness peacefully accommodated, are willing to consider that God source.

As you can imagine, even if this involved careful consideration of God in our daily life and decided we were pretty well equipped to handle things on their own - if we use only the mental and spiritual resources we have been given - is still a again, another question, no doubt to be encrypted, once again, first by our own rules.

So, interestingly enough, after we were too keen to walk through the bushes, ground of theological speculation, you get to a certain extent, where our friend sometimes intellectual, ancient Aristotle has left us, that is with the concept of God as "first mover" or "unmoved mover". While his description is obviously a bit 'more pretentious than ours, it is reassuring, close enough to make us smile the involuntary paternity of his wisdom.

So as not to disturb too long on your Web surfing curious of the world, we conclude as follows:

While the daring Italian actor is preparing to challenge the divinity of Christ in a court in Strasbourg, and the spokesman of the Catholic Church will present their evidence more revered, while the media Kern intemperately hot as the pot as they can, the entire host will all overwrought about what is, at least for us, in fact, neither the most practical application, consequential or spiritually.

We realize that we were not particularly funny in this article, but when you consider the subject high, such a goal was in fact inadequate.

Also, can not but realize you might think, OK, Smarty Pants, so what do you think matters to infinity?

We would never deny yourself the knowledge inviting? Never, I Bonny boys and girls!

So here it is. We have a faith is not shaken by such disturbances on the sea largely unmapped certainty, because we have a comforting belief in life - faith that is, after all, a logical fading, and then a general benevolence. As part of our faith in it, we believe that if we are to do well in it, not only have a much higher risk to achieve its dazzling possibilities, but also to help save it from our depredations, and, in accordance with our assumpiton supreme logic of his, which made everything he does, if you take care of someone, take care of us, who, after all, living in the service of life, eagerly accepted as free and capable of joy. We call this infinite moderate extension of our faith commitment through enlightened life.

Our only remaining hope is that we were able to deconstruct the theological storm that is likely to advance in a place you can see how, in its inevitable comparison and triangulation, informed, and your wisdom unflappable self.

Europeans Press Iran; Cartoon Present nuclear bombs for Plants

European negotiators, intent on reaching a peaceful agreement with Iran over its controversial nuclear program, have resorted to a tactic that has recently been shown to be the most reliable way to get a response in much of the Muslim world.

Recalling the reaction extraordinary Danish cartoons depicting the Prophet Muhammad, once again last week, demonstrations by a minority-turkish Iran during a new cartoon which I believe shows them in an unfavorable light, the Europeans have chosen to incorporate a cartoon in the latest proposal represents bombs on Iranian nuclear facilities.

During the next meeting with the usual contemptuous smile, but Iran's nuclear negotiator, the representative of the French cartoon explosive.

The Iranian negotiator sat back and said, "This comic is amazing. It 'is intended to be a hint?"

"I'm afraid so," the British negotiator volunteer.

"Do you mind if I beg your pardon?" He asked. "I must report this to our president!"

Then he ran with his Koran to call Iran.

"What? Another comic western that is an insult to Muslims?" President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has exploded. "Wait a powerful signal that the mullahs to hear about this! E-mail a copy now!"

When the duty Ahmadinejad received, quickly printed and carried out by the mullahs mullah, as he often does, displaying the cartoon in her smile, so respectful.

"What? A cartoon showing our sacred plants nuclear blow up?" The mullahs who ranks highest in the official end of the clamp Muslim gasped.

"It seems that way," said the President. "What should we do?

"If the Iranian people get wind of this," the cleric noted essay, "they might realize how much danger our policies are exposing them to inflammatory."

"We do not want that to happen," Ahmadinejad agreed.

"No, no, remember, never trust the average Iranian. We, in our far-sighted wisdom, has provided them with adequate education. So you can turn on us."

"But if the bombs go off, you might suspect something," the President has dared to suggest.

"And what happens if our military gets wind of their own cartoon?" Mullah speculated. "You might even suspect we are exposing them to unnecessary danger."

"And to quote an attempt to save his life," President Ahmadinejad proposed. "I mean, I'm sorry to report, can organize a coup."

"So it seems, like it or not," the mullah brood, we must respond to the cartoon. "

"Or, if you excuse me for my frankness, we could all be gone with the wind."

"No, no, my turban could fly away, and I can not have that" the cleric continued. "Every child is born with one at all. And 'Allah's way of telling us to always wear one." Then he reflected: "Anyway, after all these years, I forgot what the top of my head looks like, and I do not I know how I would react to seeing myself without it. "

"But I have defended our nuclear program so much, I sure could use a way to save face," Ahmadinejad prayed.

"No problem," said the Mullah. "And if we draw a cartoon to you to deliver an atomic bomb with Europe but with a smile of apology? First, make a joke, we joke back then?

"I like it. I've always wanted to be in my cartoon."

"And you can be. After all, you are not Muhammad."

"Where can I find a cartoon?" President Ahmadinejad asked. "We have only our leading cartoonist in jail for insulting the Turkish minority."

The cleric, given the difficulty and therefore a source of inspiration sprouted under his scalp dark. "Tell him that if we did draw him out of the clinker."

"You're so wise, my lord," the president said. "I call the jail at this time."

"No, no, go in person," the mullah recommended. "Then you can draw the cartoon while you're there - 'the life', as they say artists infidels."

"Again on the right. It 'going to jail." He stood up and hurry off as he turned in, said: "Allah be praised! Since the President is one thing. But getting to be a cartoon - even Muhammad can not be said that "

"Excuse me," said the mullah, a bit 'surprised by the allusion to Muhammad, and waving his finger to get close to Ahmadinejad. "You can not understand, Mahmoud. The way you conduct yourself is everything, if you will excuse my advice, a cartoon. Be more serious, like me." Then, pointing to his turban fine, he added, "And, incidentally, is the time to start wearing one of those sweaty delights yourself."

Mexico addresses the issue of immigration, an integral part of China

In a surprise announcement, President Vicente Fox of Mexico has revealed that his country has solved its problem of the United States, requesting the annexation as a province of China. As a result of its new status, a multitude of chores will be available.

He made the surprise announcement, not during his recent visit to America, but soon after his return to Mexico.

Mexicans by the millions applauded the decision, throwing parties at the national level, with shouts of "Viva Mexico!", "Long live China!" And the air rang with the triumphant neologism, "MexiChina, Ole!"

In his address to the nation of Mexico, President Fox said: "Today I announce that our nation has become a province of China proud As a result, we will have more jobs just to keep our hard-working people employed at home. - And jobs much better than they are migrant workers in the U.S. "

He went on to explain: "Now, it's time for American companies to invest in Mexico, to the same extent that invest in the rest of China. Finally, it is time for them to enjoy all the cheap labor right next door. Finally, it is time for Mexico to have many new factories and, over time, as a big trade imbalance with America, like the rest of China. Finally, the label "Made in Mexico" will come to stand for everything from knives and forks for Nike. "

The Chinese were happy to offer Mexican, noting, "acquiring Mexico as a province is even better to conquer Taiwan. There is no cheap labor there, and since it is in the U.S. backyard we will be able to save on shipping costs. So we will be able to produce and deliver even more fitting that we were able to work with our own cheap goods. "

As expected, U.S. firms have responded immediately to the possibility of outsourcing production to Mexico. As the CEO of an American company that was a contender early in China said, "It 's absolutely wonderful to know that there is so much cheap labor so close to home. I never realized until Mexico became part China. You can be assured production orders so that we will soon go down to Mexico! "

President Fox, when pressed by a reporter about how he thinks Mexican workers can compete with Chinese workers in terms of willingness to work long hours for low pay, he replied: "What do you think of the whole problem of proof? We have millions of workers who are so dedicated to risk their lives to earn a pittance relative north of the border. "

Washington's response was clearly negative. President Bush said: "Mexico is in this hemisphere and has no business being part of China. Furthermore, we were on track to solve the problem with the border fence and the National Guard."

A reporter asked if the fence and the presence of the National Guard may have helped to push Mexico to China.

"Of course not," said Bush. "We all know that the fence does not constitute an obstacle to the Mexican-American relations. It would only keep out people who are not climbing fast, and this is only a small minority." Then, quoting poetry, as he often does, he said "And, as Robert Frost said, 'Good fences make good neighbors'."

Democrats were quick to chastise the president and Republicans everywhere.

Senator Edward Kennedy exclaimed, "I can not tell you how I upset about it. If we had more wise guidance of the White House, we decided to advise our corporations long ago that there was no need to export jobs unclear China, when they could find inexpensive labor law over the border in Mexico. "

Senator Charles Schumer, always prescient, he said, "I knew that the fence would not be good for the Mexican-American relations. As I said during the Senate debate on immigration, the fence is really just as laws permit the gun. The criminals are not aligned for them. They just go get a gun. and intent to become Mexican immigrants find a way to scamper over the wall and slipped past the guard. "

Republican John McCain, right after getting it the hottest tickets in New York's New School, said: "I think the fact that Mexico has become a province of China is probably not a good thing for the long term and I'm not sure that it is also good in the short term. Of course, we do not want Mexico to be part of America, or that, given the level of illegal immigration that we have, is actually a species of what is happening. "

Dick Cheney has been firmly against the annexation, stating: "This change of nationality is unacceptable. And once you go something like, you can not tell where it will land on. Next thing you know Venezuela, Peru, Cuba and will be flying Chinese flag. We must convince the Mexican government to retract. If the president asks, I'll fly there and say to President Fox of these things myself. "

President Bush did not immediately comment on the offer of Cheney, perhaps remembering the trouble created exuberant diplomatic vice president during his trip through the nations of Eastern Europe, when he openly criticizes Russian President Vladimir Putin on democracy to relapse .

Meanwhile, illegal immigrants in the United States began to flow back to Mexico, so you can be among the first in line for the establishment of many new jobs will be available soon. In a last desperate attempt to appease the Mexican government, President Bush seems to indicate that he may cancel the construction of walls answer to the problem of America. Since the wall is no longer necessary, there was some chance that the amendment would meet the approval of the Senate.

An American who opposed immigration applauded the change. "The Mexicans are leaving the city as they can get their things together. What do I care if Mexico was to become part of China to make them return to their country?"

Another American, however, had a different approach. "I think it's a shame we did not think of exporting jobs to Mexico when he was still the land of tacos and enchiladas, no egg rolls, too."

Relaxed and happy American Set, agree to a short interview

Despite the disturbing news that assails us every day and seems determined to convince us that we should all be tense and unhappy recipients of the terrorist attacks all over the world forward, we remain confident that maybe somewhere there is an American who is still at least relaxed and happy.

Attempt to locate the soul untamed, should there still be one, it spread across the nation, and as we were ready to drop the shoulders and a sigh of despair, we saw a man walking down the street of a small resort town in the north-east, singing to himself the song by Louis Armstrong made eternally popular with his voice scratchy, but sincere, "What A Wonderful World."

Suspecting that we might finally have our man, we introduced ourselves and asked if he had the consent of an interview.

"Sure," he said, "but only briefly. So I can feel relaxed and happy. "

For whatever it can to help you achieve your peace and bliss, the interview follows. He reveals, among other things, focusing, in a surprising way, on topics that appear in the dictionary under the letter "F"

NewsLaugh: Just for the record, we understand that you're an American who is really relaxed and happy?

Relaxed, happy American: Yes, I am. In fact, I'm so relaxed that I can not remember when I had a tension headache. So damn happy that I smile all the time, so often, in fact, sometimes I feel like an idiot. Of course, I'm not.

NewsLaugh: Are you sure?

Relaxed, happy American: Sure, I'm sure. I'm just happy to be alive - the privileged, in fact, part of the great unfolding of life on earth and the universe. It sounds great to be part of, if you ask me, especially since I started as a small seed, swimming for his life, and an egg, wondering if and when the competitor may come from spirit.

NewsLaugh: interesting perspective. May I ask how, in this world, tense and worried, you're able to stay relaxed and happy?

Relaxed, happy American: Well, the first thing you need is what the French call away.

NewsLaugh: It means that just does not pay much attention to what's happening in the world?

Relaxed, happy American Hell, no! I allow some room for it, just so I know what's going on, a little 'how to put my hand on a coffee pot just long enough to feel the temperature, but not so long I have a blister.

NewsLaugh: Can you explain how you can maintain this perspective?

Relaxed, happy American: A lot of perspective. For example, if my body are my life, I assign events for each day something about the size of my index finger.

NewsLaugh: The index finger? Well, then, like the rest of you?

Relaxed, happy American: Oh, this is the entirety of my life, from beginning to end, I guess, maybe some eighty years - great space, especially compared the idea of living for the moment, which for me is the perfect recipe for getting too exhausted.

Newslaugh: What about the idea that only the present moment there?

Relaxed, happy American: Oh, come on, it's like watching the grass and say the blade of grass is what is now tickling the toes.

Newslaugh: Fair enough. So how does that apply to your daily life?

Relaxed, happy American: Easy. I never leave anything to the outside world, or in this case, in my personal life, become bigger than the whole, of which every event or issue is, of course, only a part. In fact, I never subject my life to anything, even when I love someone who behaves incomprehensibly. Otherwise, I would do a disservice to it. Include?

NewsLaugh: Yes, sir!

Relaxed, happy American Muchas gracias.

NewsLaugh: I noticed that spoke a little 'Spanish there?

Relaxed, happy American: So you did.

NewsLaugh: Very little. But you do not look Hispanic?

Relaxed, happy American: No, I do not, and for good reason. I'm not. But my house is open to people whose first language is Espanol. So I speak a little 'of it to get preferential treatment. For example, my air conditioner is ready for the summer. How about you?

Newslaugh: It 's like I cozy up in Mexican restaurants. But back to the taco we were talking. Sure, there are other things that contribute to its relaxed and happy?

Relaxed, happy American: Yes, there are. I feel I owe my life to do the best I can with my mind, my feelings and my body - if the three can be separated - and I so many emotional rewards from what pushes me to do, are happy.

NewsLaugh: Sounds like a pleasant pastime. Do you ever think that might be a little 'self-centered?

Relaxed, happy American: Oh, come on. There is a difference between selfishness and enlightened self-realization, because the latter includes consideration for others, that is, if you like them to have someone in your life, given in particular.

NewLaugh: OK, enough events for the day. Mind if we talk a bit about 'the great things that can burn people out, as intimations of mortality?

Relaxed, happy American: No problem! Hardly give a thought. Just figure if I take care of life, whatever made you take care of me, that is, if you take care of someone Providing more than just the stage, actors, and the food.

NewsLaugh: Fair enough. Want more?

Relaxed, happy American: Oh, one more thing. When you're down and out, must focus on the letter "F"

NewsLaugh: "F"? Why?

Relaxed, happy American: If you learn the alphabet, there is a surprising concentration of thing that people relaxed and happy.

NewsLaugh: For example?

Relaxed, happy American: Oh, food, family, friends, words like fabulous and fantastic.

NewsLaugh: E?

Relaxed, happy American: Well, good wine, fiction, philosophy, spelled, in line with an "f"

NewsLaugh: E?

Relaxed, happy American short interviews.

U.S. may join OPEC. A quarter of the oil reserves untapped World Artic.

Recent explorations of sediments deep beneath the Arctic Ocean has led geologists to estimate that about 1 / 4 of oil untapped in the world and gas reserves are located there. After evaluating the impact of the news, the U.S. may seek membership in OPEC.

President Bush, smiling and joking with King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia, at a press conference in Nome, Alaska, said: "Since we seem to have had about as much oil off Alaska as our good friend king here in the Saudi desert, seems like a good idea for America to consider the OPEC membership. The least we can say is, maybe then we will have more influence on prices at the pump. "

King Abdullah, who flew to visit the oil-rich region recently with President Bush and Vice President Cheney said: "Until today, I thought that a country must have a lot of sand for oil. Now, I see that it can also have a lot of snow. If America wants to join OPEC, we will be happy to consider the question. But, of course, we have only one vote. "

Reaction across the Middle East has not been unmixed, in Saudi Arabia. Member of the delegation to the OPEC nation, speaking on condition of anonymity in order to remain in the employ of the King Allah cited the usual ways for humans in terms of oil trade, saying: "The eternal wisdom of Allah has ordered that the world can have more oil than Saudi Arabia. But our King likes to visit George Bush at his ranch in Crawford or wherever he is, so if we see enough Gushers tarnish the Arctic Ocean, I suppose that will lead us to consider the membership of the United States. "

The Iranian representative was expected, but ultimately elusive. "If the U.S. wants to join OPEC, we can say yes or no, if ever, or at a later time. There is, of course, the more likely we will say yes or maybe sooner if the U.S. agrees that our nation proud and progressive Muslim has the right to develop nuclear weapons for peaceful purposes. "

When asked about possible opposition to U.S. membership in OPEC, President Bush made no maybes about his intentions, turning first to the king, saying, "Excuse me for saying this, but you as I am always honest . Then he turned to the reporter and said: "We have a backup plan. If other OPEC nations that control the U.S. vote against membership, we intend to form an oil cartel with Canada, which, like the Our state of Alaska, bordering the Arctic Ocean. Greenland, which also has a presence, has expressed interest in the cartel, which, among other things, we have given the working name of APEC, with the standing "A" "Artic." I also plan to invite Russia, which as you know, beyond the boundaries of 'Arctic Ocean, to consider the benefits of membership in APEC. "

Vice President Cheney, flashing his usual smile fleeting acid king, took his turn for the wise conduct of international relations, adding: "It 's quite a relief to know that we have more oil on the north as we do, and frankly , I have a bit 'like the idea of APEC. So just let me say that, with all due respect for the king, the choice is clear to OPEC. E' on their sign or ours. "

Environmentalists have been widely in difficulty. A leading researcher of the multinational team that extracted the deep cores which indicated the vast reserves said: "It 's disappointing to think that our discovery of how much oil and gas lie beneath the Arctic has led to a desire to extract it. I would have thought that everyone would just appreciate the wisdom of leaving it there. Now, I shudder to think how much the combustion of the reserves will contribute to global warming, which, unfortunately, make it even easier to pump out the oil, as there will be more ice to the left to get to the bottom. "

Eskimos generally applauded the news, with many expressing a desire to trade in their dress traditional Arab dress. An Eskimo confided: "If you want to know the truth, I like global warming. We had the cold long enough."

Every day the Americans at the pump have been excited about the prospects of a glut of domestic oil. "Wow, just think," an American SUV driver, who was at a gas station pumping gas out of his wallet, he said, "if the United States are part of the OPEC cartel or forms its own, I might even be able to keep my gas guzzler. "