Years ago, Rush Limbaugh coined the term "adult beverages" to refer to alcoholic beverages. Yet millions of dittoheads across the plain fruity lacked a guide for making the best of adult beverages. So I created the Dittohead's Guide to Adult Beverages, a collection of recipes dittohead humorous as the Rio Linda Rouser, EIB Ecstasy Elixir Club G'itmo Guzzler, and many more!
Just try these great recipes:
DEAD WHITE GUY ginger ale
Glass: a clay Bowl Stolen from Native Americans (from dead white conquistadors)
Ingredients:
Vodka 1 Part (an ingredient colorless white symbolizes oppression European Union)
3 shares Ginger Ale (containing bloodthirsty, intolerant, sugar white supremacy)
A splash of white wine (reminiscent of the French Napoleonic imperialism)
A squeeze of lemon-lime juice (made from fruit hand-picked by slaves)
A pinch of sugar (for security reasons, did not allow sugar cane)
Instructions: In a university seminar on multiculturalism, with particular attention to Native Americans, Afro-centric poetry lesbian, combine ingredients in a bowl of clay stolen from Native Americans. Eat Columbus Day while attacking white males who have the courage to keep breathing.
Origin: This adult beverage is named in honor of Christopher Columbus - a capitalist bigot European responsible for the death and murder of 80 trillion pacifist, nature-loving Native Americans (and a man whose only accomplishment was the "discovery" of someone else's yard).
SPECIAL WARNING: Under no circumstances add brown sugar to this drink adult, as is sure to be devastated and destroyed by the racist, imperialist, homophobic white sugar already present in ginger ale.
AMBROSIA Affirmative Action
Glass: a measure (to ensure the accurate implementation of quotas)
Ingredients:
0 Parts Light Rum (using light rum rum is insensitive to minorities)
Dark Rum 3 shares (to correct past injustices rampant preferences clear rum)
3 shares Soda (Cola is a favorite drink to lighter, as Sprite)
The shares that are not "quotas" (unless they really are quotas)
Instructions: While throwing an 'affirmative action bake sale "at a local college campus, or fields (EIB plural form preferred for those of you in Rio Linda), combine ingredients in a measuring cup. Eat while labeling as "racist" one of your friends or colleagues who have the courage to add light rum for their favorite adult beverages.
Origin: This adult beverage is named in honor of government sanctioned discrimination. Make sure you do not add light rum to this adult beverage when the dark rum is available. Otherwise it could cause the formation of sensitivity court sentenced him.
Special Note: A firm supporter of government sanctioned discrimination, NAALCP (National Association for the Advancement of Liberal Colored People) dreams of the day will be re-imposed prohibition in America - with only "light rum" banished from the shores of the United States .
PS Forward this page to Rush Limbaugh 15,067 fans over the next seven minutes or you will be hit with eight agonizing years of a Hillary Clinton presidency and / or the appointment of Ted "The Swimmer" Kennedy as designated driver!
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